Trump Claims He Said “Tim Apple” To Save Time Because That Totally Makes Sense

It’s amazing that we’re even circulating back to this story a full four days later. It’s not like this was a scandal or a national emergency (although I suppose as long as he’s our president we’re kind of permanently in a state of national emergency) or anything work four days of news time. This was Trump goofing up someone’s last name, which as we’ve previously addressed, is entirely in his wheelhouse. So why is this back in our news feeds? Well, because after some extremely careful consideration, Trump has come up with an explanation as to why he called CEO Tim Cook, Tim Apple.

It was to save time.

Because Cook, as you know, takes a long time to sound out. That whole one syllable.

h o w
i s
t h i s
r e a l
l i f e

The most baffling part about all of this is that President Trump took four days to come up with this brilliant explanation. Four days. At that point why not just drop it?? Who was even talking about this story anymore???? Good to know that the precious time he saved was put to good use brainstorming all of this.

It seems like everyone’s exasperated at this point.

Thankfully although this story seems like it’s gone on for way too long, the Tim Apple jokes are still ripe for the picking.

Published at Tue, 12 Mar 2019 01:38:28 +0000

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