Ham Flavored Candy Canes Are Here, I Am So Upset

One of the best things about the holiday season is all of the sweets and candies it brings with it. Apparently though that’s also one of the worst things about the holiday season, as I unfortunately just learned. I’m sorry to be dropping this on you at such an early hour, but the good news is after this your day probably can’t get any worse from here.

The candy cane is a cornerstone of the holidays, and traditionally it’s always been peppermint flavored. As time has gone on, however, new flavors have emerged, and today we have everything from root beer to orange creamsicle to even pickle flavored candy canes. Not all of them are great, personally I don’t really like any of them, but hey — diversity and options are good!

But there is a line.

A line that was most egregiously crossed by Archie McPhee, who recently unveiled their candy cane flavors of 2019.

Brace yourselves, folks, because here come ham flavored candy canes.

Yeah — hamdy canes.

Archie McPhee

Good. God.

They come in sets of six and the most horrifying thing about these monstrosities is they look just like regular candy canes. THIS IS DANGEROUS. The site advertises them as tasting “like a slice of ham”, which, gross, but if you’re gonna make a ham flavored candy I guess at least make it taste like the real thing. But still, this is not okay.

They’re only $6 for a pack, which still feels like too much considering you’re paying money to voluntarily eat a candy that tastes like ham. Buy them online if you want to, I don’t care, Christmas is cancelled.

Published at Thu, 05 Sep 2019 00:16:39 +0000