Finally The Perfect Man Exists, And He’s A Pool Float

April’s almost over and summer is just around the corner, which means people are going to start thinking about two things: getting that sweet, sweet beach body, and summer romances. First of all, listen — your body is always beach ready, but not everybody feels that way and honestly some people are dicks. And on that note, summer romances are great, but you know what can really suck? Actually dating people. You know… when you really think about it… that all sounds like kind of a headache, doesn’t it?

Well, never fear, the perfect solution does exist.

Introducing the only hunk you’ll need all summer — the inflatable kind.

Courtesy of Amazon

Just look at those MUSCLES!

Why go through all the hassle of meeting a guy you actually have to speak words to and interact with when you can jump right to the good stuff, like just lounging poolside together? Not only will he never say anything dumb or oggle other people at the beach in front of you, but he’s there to support you and keep you afloat — literally. Plus, uhh, look at how sick those shades are?

The BEST part? He’s only $19.00, which is way cheaper than any date you’ll go on.

Published at Tue, 23 Apr 2019 23:50:27 +0000